Category: Random


The Internet is for Cats

Filed Under: Random by Katuchuu — Leave a comment
July 22, 2011
credit to dazzlejunction.com

we all do, mom

I don’t care what hilarious World of Warcraft machinima videos set to Avenue Q songs you’ve been listening to, everyone knows the reason that the internet was invented was so that people could share photos of their cats. Yes, I know I just made a post about lolcats, but this is different. These are not lolcats, expertly-chosen photos of animals in compromising positions paired with hilarious repartee. These are your grandmother’s cat pictures. Grainy, overexposed, possibly taken with a cell phone. Cute, but never really capturing the essence of why this animals is fantastic. Unless you’re this immensely talented actress. She’ll take any cat photos you have on offer.* These are the cats the internet was designed to host.

Oh, and stories. I like to brave /an/ on 4chan every now and again out of boredom, and tonight there was a jewel of thread: “Post weird things your pets do.”

Now, sometimes I think my cats are the craziest creatures ever, until I remember that other cats also exist. Not everyone realises this base assumption: that animals are crazy bastards. As such, there were a few fairly tame “quirks,” like:

My cat doesn’t use the cat perch unless she wants cat nip.

or

One of my dogs will bark and move its legs as if it’s running when she sleeps. My other for some reason likes to get in trouble no matter how many times you tell her no, she will even look at you to show you what she is about to do.

Man. Talk about weird! I bet only 80% of the rest of the species do those things! I shouldn’t complain, though, because some of the posts were downright worrying:

My cat occasionally walks like a crab. He will turn corners by drifting.

and

my cat likes to eat vaseline. I have to move it to the top shelf every time she gets into my room, I don’t know what happened to the cap.

Although partially worrying about the second is that contributor’s apparently frequent use of vaseline.

In any case, I tend to try to check myself when thinking about my cats as especially bizarre, and it’s true that a lot of their strangeness was echoed in that post, like Cubby’s love of muffin wrappers, the habit Blaster has of scratching everything BUT the cat litter when he’s done using the litterbox, and a non-cat related weirdness regarding a suicidal loach (really, how many people other than me and this dude can have owned a suicidal loach?). However, there were some things that weren’t covered, which I feel would be unkind to keep to myself.

this is him

Let’s begin with the primarily sane cat, Cubby. Cubby/Cubs/Cubbers/Sir Cubbington is the younger of my two cats, he’s a black-on-black tabby with occasional white tufts (his siblings were identical to Blaster) who weighs in at a solid 20 pounds. He’s essentially the definition of gentle giant: you could do anything to this cat and he wouldn’t raise a finger to you. I can bathe this monster by myself without him escaping or me incurring injury. You can turn him upside down and use him like a barbell and he’ll just look at you with sad acquiescence. “It’s okay, mom. I trust you, mom,” he seems to say. “I don’t like it, but if you say so.”

see, i can even do this to him

Cubby is not without his assertive moments, though. While he tends to let out a terrified mouse-like squeak when frightened, he will insist on having some things his way, or else. For example, he will not be left out of the bathroom if it’s time for a shower. Cubby is a thirsty cat, who will in every case choose to drink hot water (not warm – hot) over cool or room temperature water**, and the shower is his favourite place to get it. He will perch himself precariously on the rounded edge of my tub and stick his head in to drink the water as it falls.

sadly, this is what most of cubby's pictures look like

Furthermore, he demands a sacrifice of water wrung from my hair to drink before he will quit the bathroom. Apparently hairwater is delicious, because lately Blaster’s taken to haunting the bathroom during showertime, as well, and nibbling at my hair as I dry off.

Perhaps most notable, however, is Cubby’s breath-smelling fixation. It began as he was a kitten, when I would cuddle with him in bed. Back then, he was small enough to sleep next to my head without suffocating me. This is no longer the case, but Cubby can’t take a hint. He loves to sleep with his face under mine, but a) that makes my face itchy, and b) he also takes the opportunity to mark his mouth scent on my lips, which is gross. So, to keep our faces apart at night, I would discourage him from coming closer by blowing in his face. He was deterred at first, but eventually he started taking that advantage to sniff out my latest meal. Soon he would come up and sniff my mouth without prompting. As time wore on, it got worse and worse until nowadays he will, in fact, actively force his head into my mouth to sniff, and will then “lick” my breath. I’m still trying to break him of this, but goddamn if it isn’t funny. I’m going to be an awful mom.

"i know i'll regret it, but i have to touch that tummy!"

My other cat, Blaster, is the “bad kid” of the family. From kittenhood, he was so feisty he was essentially untouchable. He doesn’t like to be picked up, he doesn’t like laps, and he used to shrug off petting as well. This is a tremendous irony because Blaster is, in all seriousness, one of the cutest cats I’ve ever seen (although he photographs averagely), and is freakishly soft (like a bunny, I am not joking), to boot. In recent years, he’s become more open to affection. He will allow himself to be held for a short time, during which he becomes “mappy.” I do not know if this emotion is exclusive to Blaster, but it involves him purring like a madman, thrashing his tail about angrily, and meowing in piteous fashion until released. Once released, he seems to undergo rapid amnesia of the whole event, and immediately returns to normal. He then enjoys being petted on his face. Not his head, his face. As in, if you place your hand over his eyes and rub it vigourously back and forth, he’s in heaven. He also likes when you stick your fingers in his ear, and he loves noogies.

lookit those eyes

However, he has a thick rebellious streak. When I am sleeping against his wishes, he will find any local crinkly thing and poke it with one paw while watching me eagerly for a reaction. If crinkly things are unavailable, he will hop onto the bed and scratch the wall beside my head until I yell at him. Should I be so heinous as to fall back to sleep, he will then lay patiently next to me for a time, thwapping me with his tail, and systematically pulling all my belongings off of my nightstand with one deliberate paw. One. By. One.

Why is he so dedicated to getting my attention, you might ask (because this is certainly not limited only to times when I’m asleep)? It could be a number of reasons, the primaries of which are these:

Feeding time. Times vary between 9-9:30AM, and the same PM. Blaster is a very punctual eater. When eating, he daintily grabs one single piece of cat food from his bowl, turns to his right, and eats the piece over the floor. If the kibble has corners (or is an X-shape), he will eat all but one corner, and leave that on the floor in favour of a fresh piece. He is less insistent on it now, but he used to refuse to eat until he’d been petted. Once you began petting him, he’d bend down and eat his food while meowing. “HOMP OM NYOM MYOM HRONCH NYOM NYOWM.” Now he only nudges the hand that feeds him violently enough that kibble ends up all over the floor.

only blasters get to sleep, in this household

Lonely Time. Lonely time occurs from 7am-8am, and from 7pm-8pm. During this time, Blaster employs his usual methods to annoy me into paying attention to him, but as soon as I give him even the slightest hint of love, he turns into a purring maniac and flops bodily down onto me, demanding petting until he’s done being petted.

Post-Feeding Time. Occurs within three hours of Feeding Time. Not content to have been petted or to have nuzzled earlier, Blaster will not rest or waver from his mission until he gets someone to drop what they’re doing, follow him into the kitchen, and observe him eating some more of his food. He, I am completely serious, meows when you stand up, and will wait for you until you actually follow him into the kitchen, where he will look up at you to be sure you’re actually watching him, and then he’ll start eating. If you try to leave before he starts eating, the requirements for Post Feeding Time have not been met, and the process will begin again.

However, he does have his endearing points. He likes to rest with just his head underneath the couch skirt, and the rest of him sticking out in plain view. He recognizes my wake-up alarm (a honky tonk piano song) as Cuddle Time alarm, and will run to my room from upstairs to obtain cuddles, even if I’m just listening to the song on my laptop. He also hates the smell of chapstick, and will bat away all offending sticks of Burt’s Bees with squinting eyes. He’s also a conversationalist, and will meow (or at least open his mouth) every time you pet him. He does tire of being copied, though, so if you keep meowing back at him, he gets irritated and either attacks or leaves. Actually, that last sentence applies to most of my dealings with Blaster.

That’s a fairly in-depth overview of what I feel is strange about my cats, befitting the statutes on the internet in both length and inclusion of pictures that are grainy, blurry, or overexposed. You now have the highlights of a Day in the Life of a crazy-cat-lady-in-training. Whether my cats are unique in their peculiarities remains to be seen, and so I turn to you, internet:

ITT: Post weird things your pets do.

 

* I could absolutely write a whole entry on that video alone, although most of it would involve caps lock and the “lyrics.”

** We thought he might have a medical issue, but it turns out no, he just really likes hot water.

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A Bit of Shameless LOL

Filed Under: Random by Katuchuu — Leave a comment
July 21, 2011

i'll do anything

So chances are, if you’ve ever been on the internet, you’ve been to i can has cheezburger at least once. Or if you haven’t ever been on the internet, you may have seen their book, or bought their licensed underpants (they don’t exist, I checked) or something. In any case, I think at this point pretty much anyone who can claim to live in a first-world country is familiar with the cheezburger network, or at the very least, cheeseburgers, which are delicious.

can't say no to a well-placed TLC reference!

I am going somewhere with this, I promise. Somewhere fantastically shameless, in fact. To hone in on the point, if you’re aware of ichc, or lolcats (which originated on 4chan, I believe, and were originally dubbed “cat macros” *pushes glasses up nose*), you have probably made one. Or had an idea for one. Now, internet memes, like folklore, are authorless. The guy who originally thought that a grey Persian-mix cat looked desirous of improperly spelled beef patty sandwiches has no name, and claiming authorship of a cat macro makes basically no difference. You know the “ok wut is ur wishes” macro? Probably not, but yeah, that one’s mine (and saved from ignomity by anonymous, thanks guys).  Me telling you that doesn’t really mean anything to you. Nevertheless, I feel the need to point out that it’s the case, as I suspect many other lolmakers (or whatever is the hip term for people who put words on animal pictures is) do as well.

i wish buzzkills had been more popular

Even the funniest macro can’t really earn us the recognition we’re vying for in this day and age. There may never be another “I haz a flavur” cat. Short of being the guy who invented lolspeak*, I doubt that any claim to trendsetting in the image-macro-making world will turn any heads.

Yet, here I am, making a blog post to show off my “LOL”s, as they are so appropriately dubbed. View full article »

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Whatever Happened to Portmanteausdays: Or, Blogging From the Heart

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July 19, 2011

i love you, fuckyeahnouns.com

So, somewhere in the deliciously BPAL-scented debris pile that is my computer desk, I have a little slip of paper that’s coated in ideas for Portmanteausdays posts. Excited, and with the best of intentions, I wrote up the first post, and brainstormed like mad at work the next day, intending to write up posts well in advance and finally take advantage of WordPress’s timed posting feature.

Since then, my crippling self-doubt, as well as some well-meaning concrit from friends, dampened my enthusiasm to the point of inaction. This, paired with a rediscovery of Dragon Age 2 and a shockingly busy run of shifts and the restaurant, meant that I set the idea aside essentially completely, and considered actually deleting the first post to save myself the embarrassment.

It’s not that portmanteaus don’t excite me anymore (you know you still do it for me, baby). They’re everywhere, they’re an integral part of English-speaking culture, and many of them aren’t even thought of as combinations of two words, anymore. Of course, there are the ones like Brangelina (or my personal favourite, Gyllenspoon), that are clearly denoted. But others, such as “modem” (“MOdulator DEModulator”) have become so ingrained in our speech that we don’t even notice them.

I digress. It is obviously not that the subject no longer excites me, but frankly I’m not sure it’s something that I can devote a whole weekly post to and remain interesting. Here, then, is the clincher, as they say.

it's funny because cats can't speak english

Blogging is hard for me, or has been, because I set up the expectation that it’s different from writing in my livejournal. I’ve made it hard for myself by, essentially, convincing myself that I’m selling a product, and that I have to do kitschy blog things like themed days or giveaways to interest people. I’m not saying that’s not to some extent true, and I don’t mean to downplay how fun themed days can be to write, but I think at some point since I began this blog I lost track of what is in theory most important: writing about what I want to write about.

If this was a Hollywood flick, right now I would hit “submit,” close my laptop, and look lovingly into the eyes of the lover/mentor who taught me how to love again, and gave me my groove back. If it was an indie movie, I would drill a hole in my head to escape the pressure of blogging and would no longer be good at math (Pi did not impress me). And if this was a Kung-fu movie, I would be awesome and probably British.

click for an excellent video

this guy is my hero

My sensei says I should never fight in anger.

I was going somewhere with this. Oh, yes, portmanteausdays. It’s too good of a portmanteau to let go (shut up, I have my dreams), so you’ll still see them now and again, but now you’ll see them when I have a great entry to show you, not just when I feel like my blog should be updated or else people will lose interest.

Hai-ya!

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She’s Such a Tease

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July 19, 2011

Earlier this week on my livejournal I asked for help identifying a couple of AIM screennames. Always when I’d been AFK for ages, I’d have a

>Hey

>hello?

Waiting for me, from a screenname called geordielouise; I assumed a female Star Trek fan. I later got messages from both Geordi AND “ibpapasgirl” who, I am sorry to say, reminds me unerringly of potatoes, due to my year and a half of Spanish class. Thanks to my rapid devouring of all the Sherlock Holmes stories recently, I was able to deduce from the timestamps and the font colours that they were the same person, on different screennames. I gathered that they checked an alternate screenname to see if I’d blocked them.

No one on livejournal had any inkling as to their mysterious identity, but I received the suggestion to just wholesale block them. I was tempted, but unfortunately I am too soft-hearted to rule someone out completely without ever talking to them. Especially Star Trek fans. I am so, so pleased that I did not block them.

Today I managed to catch ibpapasgirl as soon as she messaged me. We had the following conversation:

ibpapasgirl is available 1:30 am
ibpapasgirl 1:30 am
hi
me 1:30 am
hi there
sorry i always miss you
ibpapasgirl 1:30 am
Hey what’s up? 23/F here. u?
me 1:30 am
essentially the same :P 26 though
how did you find this screenname?
ibpapasgirl 1:30 am
Hmm. Have we chatted before?
me 1:30 am
i was going to ask you the same thing
ibpapasgirl 1:31 am
Oh ok. I wasn’t sure. Anyways… Whats up?
me 1:31 am
not much. melting in the heat XD

ibpapasgirl 1:31 am

Oh Im like sooo bored. Theres nothing to do.
Ohhh wait. I got a idea. Have you ever watched a girl strip on cam? :-X h
me 1:32 am
ah. you’re a robot, then
ibpapasgirl 1:32 am
A bot? not hardly babe. Are you?
me 1:32 am
if i am, i am the most eloquent bot ever
ibpapasgirl 1:33 am
A bot? not hardly babe. Are you?
me 1:33 am
o rly
bot?
ibpapasgirl 1:33 am
Welllllll…. Do you wanna watch me strip on cam? ;-) h
me 1:33 am
not really
ibpapasgirl 1:33 am
Yeah? Ok you have to signup through this website that my cam is linked trhough so i cant be recorded ok?
It only takes a second babe and its free. k?
me 1:34 am
actually i said no
not interested
ibpapasgirl 1:34 am
http://girls who are sexy and not robots.com/nikki ok go there then click on the gold JOIN FREE button at the top of the page. ok?
me 1:34 am
i’m still not interested
ibpapasgirl 1:34 am
Also it does ask for a credit card when you signup. But DONT worry
me 1:34 am
let me guess, it doesn’t charge right away
ibpapasgirl 1:34 am
It dosent charge the card at all. Not even a penny. Its just to make sure your over 18. k?
me 1:34 am
oh wow, what a great deal
i’d have to be a fool not to
ibpapasgirl 1:35 am
K babe well hurry up. When you get logged in then view my cam and we can have some fun :-X h
I also have some toys ;-X but you have to tip me some gold or take me in private to see those.
me 1:35 am
oh really, toys?
like, power rangers?
or like my little pony?
ibpapasgirl 1:35 am
Hey lets talk on there my aim is messing up.
me 1:35 am
aww but i want to know what kind of toys
are they like action figures?
or plush?
maybe GI Joe?

me 1:36 am
or like board games! i love board games
wanna play risk?
hello?
nikki?
dang, you got me all excited and then left me hanging :-(  

Such a tease. Nikki, if you see this, and you change your mind about those board games…well, you have my screenname, babe.

(PS – I seriously never thought I would use the “potatoes” tag more than that one time…)

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Portmanteausdays – The Very Beginning

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June 21, 2011

not this portman

I’ve been meaning to do a themed post day here for a while, but I was hindered by the fact that I couldn’t think of anything I was excited enough about to post on the subject of every week. I considered Mustache Mondays (tape mustaches to things, take pictures, post them, ???, profit), and a few others before Portmanteausdays occurred to me. The misspelling of Tuesday is deliberate: Portmantuesdays sounds like I really, really like Natalie. Which I do, but that is beside the point. I intend to post most weeks on Tuesday about portmanteaux I am particularly fond of, or on the subject in general.

not this kind, either

As my exasperated straight man (or best friend, whatever you want to call him) will attest, I am a fan of the portmanteau. Not the kind pictured to the left, although I certainly have a healthy respect for them. I refer instead to the word sort of portmanteau, described by Wikipedia thusly:

 

A portmanteau (pronounced /p?rt?mænto?/ ( listen), plural: portmanteaus or portmanteaux) or portmanteau word is a blend of two (or more) words or morphemes into one new word. A portmanteau word typically combines both sounds and meanings, as in smog, coined by blending smoke and fog. More generally, it may refer to any term or phrase that combines two or more meanings.

There are loads of portmanteaux that are fairly common in modern usage: frenemy for example (the person who is civil to your face but talks about you behind your back), or today’s example, automagical.

 

automagical (comparative more automagical, superlative most automagical)

  1. Automatic, but with an apparent element of stage magic. Commonly used in computer and other technology fields, referring to complex technical processes hidden from the view of users or operators. Includes a connotation of specialness and often implies pride on the part of the process creator (especially when the person using the word is the process creator). Sometimes, also used in sarcastic way, ironically implying an impossible process.

actually i kind of want this

Automagical, or automagically, is one of my favourite portmanteaux of all times. A friend of mine (who ironically was deeply disappointed when she found out I was not writing about portmanteau bags) uses it fairly often, and was my introduction to the word. I think that it goes a bit beyond the definition that Wikipedia gives – It can in theory replace the word “automatic” for the very enthusiastic (see above friend). There doesn’t have to be any stage magic behind automatically alphabetizing all my data in OpenOffice, it’s just excellent that I click Sort > Alphanumeric, and poof! TONS of work I no longer have to do by hand. Due to the fact that it was done as quickly as if I’d waved a wand at it (which I would never do, by the way…I use the Force instead) makes it automagical.

get it?

Perhaps the reason that my best friend dislikes portmanteaux is that they are inherently punny. I appreciate a good pun (which admittedly are fairly hard to come by, and are rarely featured in names of cafes – I’m looking at you, The Grounds Keeper), and I tend to gravitate toward them. Evidently I am not the only one, as a number of portmanteaux are taken an extra step further to get that little extra layer of pun in there, such as the one pictured to the left.

 

 

It might seem superfluous to have a word that essentially means the same thing, but as stated above, it adds a connotative value to the idea that is lost in the comparatively dry word “automatically.” As Shopkick may have discovered in their avoidance of the word, there really is no replacement for it:

if only there was a word that meant both of those things

 

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Launch of Littlest Teapot

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May 20, 2011

fashion blog excellence

Lately I’ve been neglecting this blog to get its sub-blog, littlest teapot, going.

Littlest Teapot is my fashion-centric blog, which deals primarily with lolita and mori-girl fashions, along with everyday outfit posts, and hair and makeup related posts as well. I felt that it was going to be too much content to mix with dorkumentary, so I decided to split it off and I’m very pleased with the result!

plus now i can use all my cute graphics

The content over there is slightly sparse at the moment, as I have a significant backlog of items to go through and backdate, but you’ll see it blossom over the next few weeks!

 

see? look how cute

As to dorkumentary, I’m planning on implementing some changes around here, as well. I’ve switched up the layout a bit already, and I’m working on setting blogging themes and goals for myself.

  • I’d like to begin blogging my bentos, which is unfortunately the last item in a long line of things that need to be completed first (such as make my kitchen usable and shop for supplies).
  • I plan to upload some more of my portfolio, which is to say, my essays. I don’t kid myself that they’re not what’s bringing the boys to the yard, but nevertheless there are some I’m proud enough of that I’d like to share them.
  • I want to come up with a more focused way to share my photography. I’m not sure whether I should do a photo-a-day sort of thing, or make themes and upload shots that correspond with them, or what. Still mulling that over.
  • Also, I’ve started collecting iTouch/iPhone apps to review. You’ve likely already seen the few reviews that I’ve posted, and my goal over the summer is to review one app a day (some free, some paid, as I can afford them), and I hope in doing so to inform and entertain you.
  • Finally, I’d like to find a way to make things a little more interactive, because I’d love to garner some more responses from you folk. If you’ve any suggestions, do comment and let me know!

 

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Nathan Fillion for Nathan Drake

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October 14, 2010

they even have the same "oh shit" face

Ladies and Gentlemen, a public service announcement.

Nathan Fillion, of Firefly and Castle fame, is campaigning for the part of Nathan Drake in the Uncharted movie.

If you’ve played Uncharted, or seen it played, you know that Nathan Drake is essentially modelled after Nathan Fillion physically, and he and Nolan North (Drake’s voice actor) share a great many mannerisms in common. If you HAVEN’T played Uncharted, then a) play it, or b) take our word for it. Nathan Fillion IS Nathan Drake.

Gashi and I bandied the idea about privately years ago, cuz, yanno, wouldn’t it just be COOL if they made a real movie out of the movie? And oh, man, Nathan Fillion could TOTALLY be Nathan Drake!

comparison, courtesy of gamerevolution.com

So this is kind of like the beginning of a dream come true for me. If this doesn’t happen, then you all hate freedom. And orphans. And I will personally whine for possibly YEARS.

NOW THAT YOU’RE ALL HYPED, WHAT DO YOU DO?

Everyone’s got a Twitter, right? Sure, you never use it anymore because you decided that you didn’t care what your friends thought about pizza and girls 24/7 (or at least that’s how it went for me). That doesn’t matter! You still have one! Log in, and retweet stuff from Nathan’s Twitter:

http://twitter.com/NathanFillion

I chose the one with “#NathanFillionForNathanDrake” in it, for simplicity’s sake. Repost to your journal, your blog, your website! The more this spreads, the more chances we have of someone important hearing about it.

And besides, Zachary Quinto wants you to. If you won’t do it for Nathan Fillion, and you won’t do it for me, you’ll do it for Zachary Quinto, right?

Or do you hate America?*

*If you don’t live in America, please replace this with your current or preferred country of residence.

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Been a Long Lonely, Lonely, Lonely Time

Filed Under: Hobbies, Random by Katuchuu — Leave a comment
September 26, 2010

I’ve been away. My hope was to get all my vacation blogging done and uploaded, but well…the best laid plans, right? I do have most of my photos edited and ready to upload to flickr, and I have bits and pieces of the vacay actually written out.

In the meantime, other things have been happening. I’ve begun the first semester of my sophomore year at UW Parkside, and have cut down significantly on my BPAL purchasing – thank GOD. I had to move from keeping track of it here to making full-blown colour-coded spreadsheets, and honey, organization ain’t my strong point.

In the time I’ve been away from the blog, however, I received 222 comments. Two-hundred and twenty-two. Of these, three were actual people. Two of them were the same person. As I was scanning them for a rare gem of an actual comment, I had the great fortune of actually reading one or two of them. Here’s an excerpt from my favourite of the bunch:

Why have you removed my post? It was very helpful information and i guarantee atleast 1 person found it helpful unlike the rest of the comments on this web site. I’ll post it again.

How inconsiderate of me! I never intended to deny you guys the helpful information you no doubt turned to this blog to receive.

My second favourite(s) came in the form of two separate comments that…kind of said the same thing?


anatomical shoes?

“There nurse be a disaster of what I’m piece de reistance lovemaking shoes,” she reveals. “I’ve made a luck of pieces that can decoy, seduct and
that imply non-poisonous the deal. The shoes will be iconic, architectural and anatomical. We stand in want to be the mention a go out belly up a swell to journey’s end
throughout the scale of when women starvation by reason of to accept hot to trot. I scarcity the flat communication that [name of designer] has with his women.”

“There leave be a grouping of what I’m m‚tier sexual intercourse shoes,” she reveals. “I’ve made a lot of pieces that can lecher, seduct and
that will staunch the deal. The shoes inclination be iconic, architectural and anatomical. We after to be the scoot to terminus
championing when women necessity to feel sharp to trot. I scarceness the flat duologue that [name of designer] has with his women.”

I wish I could translate that for you better, but who’s better than Babelfish, anyway? I’ve removed the name of said designer in the hopes that I won’t get a million hits from people searching for these piece de resistance, lovemaking, non-poisonous shoes. I have to say, I kind of want a pair.

from http://www.marymagdalene.jp/

In other news, Lolita. Not the book, or the movie. The fashion. It was probably only a matter of time before I gave into yet another too-expensive interest, and with my weeaboo tendencies, I’m surprised it took me this long to really get into the idea of loli fashion.

Part of the issue is that when I first heard about it, it was still JUST Gothic Lolita: the black and white maid dresses with cat ears, etc. The stuff that modern Gothic Lolitas now turn their noses up at, considering it a part of their foolish youth. Now there’s Sweet Lolita (And OTT = Over The Top Sweet), Hime Loli, Ero Loli, Classic Loli, Country Loli, and even Guro Loli?! I consider myself most interested in Classic and simple Sweet Loli styles, though I do hope to pioneer Nerd Loli…a JSK with some Space Invaders print, perhaps? A notebook-paper fabric with calculus print for a skirt separate?

In any case, I bought a dress used from a girl over livejournal, which whetted my appetite. At this point, as I am still financially recovering from my vacation and the BPAL Halloween update, I can’t afford any “Brand”/”Burando” dresses like the one to the left. As much as I adore Mary Magdalene designs (and Angelic Pretty, and Innocent World, etc etc), I’m not able to justify $250-$300 for a dress like that…and they wouldn’t fit my size 18 American ass (and boobs!) anyway.

So I recently placed an order with one of the more affordable companies, Fan+Friend, instead. Fanplusfriend is not brand, and doesn’t have the same quality that brand name loli clothing companies do. The used dress I got was from this company, and the printed decals had obviously bled in the wash, not to mention numerous loose threads. The threads don’t bother me, personally, and I haven’t ordered anything with printed decals, so frankly I’m not too worried. I ordered everything in the proper size, gave them my measurements to their requirements, and also specified that none of the skirts go past knee length (reviews I’d read mentioned that they tend to run a bit long, and I’m short).

My order ought to arrive within three to four weeks, and I will definitely update with photos and a review of what I bought!

one of the dresses I ordered

In the meantime, I’ve been following egl and daily_lolita on livejournal, and recently stumbled upon the blog of another plus-sized lolita, called The Ugly Duckling, which I’d recommend. I found her through a review of Bodyline, which expressed the very sentiment that’d been vexing me about them: their clothes are too damned small. They are having a half-off sale for the owner’s birthday, until further notice…and guess who won’t fit a single garment? Me, that’s who. No $30 Angelic Pretty replicas for me!

Well, I suppose that’s enough for now. When it rains, it pours, eh?

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I Wish I Was Cool Like Allie

Filed Under: Random by Katuchuu — Leave a comment
July 26, 2010

So for the past day or so, I’ve been reading Hyperbole and a Half, which you probably know from that one livejournal icon about going to the bank like an adult. It’s hilarious, and I recommend it.

Now, for some background: I used to draw comics. They were in pencil on looseleaf printer paper, and they’re all gone, and that’s okay. I blatantly appropriated the drawing style from Sluggy Freelance (only without the effort and goodness), and most of my comics were “guest strips.” Which is to say, they featured characters from other webcomics. Like Indie Rock Pete from Diesel Sweeties. Or that guy from SomethingPositive whose name I don’t remember anymore. The other characters in the comics? Were me and my fellow 13-year-old friends. Hijinx would ensue.

Needless to say, you now understand why I don’t mind that years’ worth of work is utterly lost to the ages.

What I do mind is the fact that I read stuff like Hyperbole and a Half, and end up laughing so hard that I cry, and then feel really inadequate. I don’t have a cool comiblog. I don’t even have a cool regular-type blog. I just post perfume stuff and pictures of dolls. Which has its place, mind you, but man.

So I was thinking up this post, and was like “I should totally draw something in paint and then I can be cool like Allie.” But as with most of my attempts to imitate people cooler than me, the motivation was there, but the content was sadly lacking.

Then, it was like an act of God. I was walking back to my computer and I passed my boyfriend on the couch. My boyfriend, who was sitting next to the box of Dunkin Donuts.

“Delicious donut holes!” I thought, and bent to acquire some. Upon opening the package, I saw the following:

It was empty. EMPTY. He had eaten ALL the donut holes and then CLOSED THE PACKAGE BACK UP.

“What the hell?!” I asked, “Why the hell would you close it back up?”

Of course, the downside is that Gashi didn’t respond in kind, so I was left hanging without any hilarious way to end my donuts story. And without donuts. I then went to try my hand at some MS Paint and in doing so gained a lot of respect for Allie, and lost a lot for MC Escher. The first donut hole container I drew had even more questionable physics and optical illusions than Escher could dream of. Take THAT!

Anyway, don’t expect more ripoffy illustrations. If you want more Hyperbole and a Half, just go read that instead. Who knows, maybe I’ll take the time to do something creative of my own instead of just riding on the backs of giants.

Although riding on the backs of giants sounds pretty awesome.

ETA: But then this happened!

Me: Why are you thrusting at my head?

Gashi: Why not?

Me: Because you could get my head pregnant.

Gashi: …

Me: What?! That’d be terrible! My head would get all heavy and swollen…and I’d have to have the baby out my nose or something. Where are you going? Come back!

Gashi: No.

That’s funny, right? Right?

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